how to tell if someone is really bisexual:
- if a true bisexual utters their name backwards, it will send them back to their home dimension for a minimum of 90 days.
- fire type bisexuals will always be able to learn the move solarbeam, unless they are flareon.
- biologically, bisexuals are incapable of going down stairs.
- some bisexuals are unable to cast a shadow, though this is currently up for debate
*texts back 3 weeks later* sorry I fell asleep
you ever wanna fuck the living shit outta somebody but also cook for them and make sure they’re emotionally stable?
friend: i’m getting mcdonalds you want anything?
me: i don’t have money
friend: it’s all good, i’ll pay
the sound of teenage girls laughing near you when you’re by yourself is literally the most terrifying thing a person can experience